I wish I knew what could have happened to our relationship.
As I sit by the river’s edge, contemplating, “Why am I here?”
We’ve never had a good relationship, that I know for sure.
But as I sit here catching my breath and feeling a lump in my throat,
There’s a feeling.
“I wish it could have been different”.
I wish the long nights talking would have amounted to something.
I wish that you would have tried to understand me just a little bit more.
I wish seeing you didn’t make me feel suicidal all of a sudden.
I wish so many things, and they just didn’t happen. And I guess I have to accept that.
There’s some things in life that are too complicated to explain. Why me? I often ask and did ask in the past.
But sometimes there’s nothing to explain.
I’ve changed a lot. I don’t tolerate abuse anymore. And sometimes abuse is subtly unnoticeable. And sometimes people judge your situation without truly knowing anything about it.
At some point you have to put your foot down.
Or else you’d go insane.
